1. SHAKE YOUR RUMP

Now I rock a house party at the drop of a hat
I beat a biter down with an aluminum bat
A lot of people they be Jonesin' just to hear me rock the mic
They'll be staring at the radio
Staying up all night
So like a pimp I'm pimpin'
I got a boat to eat shrimp in
Nothing wrong with my leg just be-boy limpin'
Got arrested at the Mardi Gras for jumping on a float
My man MCA's got a beard like a billy goat
Oowah oowah is my disco call
MCA hu-huh I'm gettin' rope y'all
Routines I bust rhymes I write
And I'll be busting routines and rhymes all night
Like eating burgers or chicken or you'll be picking your nose
I'm on time homie that's how it goes
You heard my style I think you missed the point
It's the joint

Mike D yeah? With your bad self running things
What's up with your bad breath onion rings
Well I'm Mike D and I'm back from the dead
Chillin' at the beaches down at Club Med
Make another record 'cause the people they want more of this
Suckers they be saying they can take out Adam Horovitz
Hurricane you got clout
Other DJ's he'll take your head out
A puppet on a string I'm paid to sing or rhyme
Or do my thing I'm
In a lava lamp inside my brain hotel
I might be peakin' or freakin' but I rock well
The Patty Duke the wrench and then I bust the tango
Got more rhymes than Jamaica got Mango Kangols
I got the peg leg at the end of my stump
Shake your rump

Full clout y'all
Full clout y'all
And when the mic is in my mouth I turn it out y'all
Full clout

Never been dumped 'cause I'm the most mackinest
Never been jumped 'cause I'm known the most packinest
Yeah we've got beef chief
We're knocking out teeth chief
And if you don't believe us you should question your belief Keith
Like Sam the butcher bringing Alice the meat
Like Fred Flintstone driving around with bald feet
Should I have another sip no skip it
In the back of the ride and bust with the whippet
Rope a dope dookies all around the neck
Whoo ha got them all in check
Running from the law the press and the parents
Is your name Michael Diamond?
No mine's Clarence
From downtown Manhattan the village
My style is wild and you know that it still is
Disco bag schlepping and you're doing the bump
Shake your rump


2. HEY LADIES

Hey ladies in the place I'm callin' out to ya
There never was a city kid truer and bluer
There's more to me than you'll ever know
And I've got more hits than Sadaharu Oh
Ton Thumb Tom Cushman or Tom Foolery
Date women on T.V. with the help of Chuck Woolery
Words are flowing out just like the Grand Canyon
And I'm always out looking for a female companion
I threw the lasso around the tallest one and dragged her to the crib
I took off her moccasins and put on my bib
I'm wheelin' and dealin' I make a little bit of stealing
I'll bring you back to the place and your dress I'm peeling
Your body's on time and your mind is appealing
Staring at the cracks up there upon the ceiling
Some such nonsense is the bass that I'm throwing
Talking to a girl telling her I'm all knowing
She's talking to the kid to the who
I'm telling here every lie that you know that I never did
Hey Ladies, get funky

Me in the corner with a good looking daughter
I dropped my drawers and it was welcome back Kotter
We were cutting up the rug she started cutting up the carpet
In my apartment I begged her please stop it
The gift of gab is the gift that I have
And that girl ain't nothing but a crab
Educated no stupid yes
And when I say stupid I mean stupid fresh
I'm not James at fifteen or Chachi in charge
I'm Adam and I'm adamant about living large
With the white sassoons and the looks that kill
Makin' love in the back of my Coupe De Ville
I met a little cutie she was all hopped up on zootie
I liked the little cutie but I kicked her in the bootie
'Cause I don't kinda go for that messin' around
You be listening to my records' a number one sound
Step to the rhythm step step to the ride
I've got an open mind so why don't you all get inside
Tune in turn on to my tune that's live
Ladies flock like fish to my line
Hey Ladies, get funky

She's got a gold tooth you know she's hardcore
She'll show you a good time then she'll show you the door
Break up with your girl it ended in tears
Vincent Van Gogh and mail that ear
I call her in the middle of the night when I'm drinking
The phone booth on the corner is damp and it's stinking
She said come on over it was me that she missed
I threw that trash can through her window cause you know I got dissed
Your old lady left you and you went girls(x3) insane
You blew yourself up in the back of the six train
Take my advice at any price a gorilla like your mother is mighty weak
Sucking down pints till I didn't know
Woke up in the morning at the Won Ton Ho
'Cause I announce I like girls that bounce
With the weight that pays about a pound per ounce
Girls with curls and big long locks
And beatnik chicks just wearing their smocks
Walking high and mighty like she's number one and
She thinks she's the passionate one


3. 33% GOD

Can you feel it" "Can you feel it
I say get up get up get up get up
Get up get up get up get up get up
Get down
I know-I know-I know
I know your going to dig this
It's the joint
Whooooo.. Who's car it that
Wait a minute..

Get down
Just like this

Is your name Michael Diamond
Wohoohaa.. yeah
G-G-G-Get down


4. DIS YOURSELF INB '89 (Just Do It)

Hey Ladies.. Break dance
Hey ladies get funky
All the ladies in the house
The ladies the ladies
Hey ladies get funky
Girl girl girl
Hey ladies in the place
Girl girl girl
Hey yo, ladies
Girl girl girl
Hey, ladies in the place
Girl girl girl
Hey young ladies
Girl girl girl
Foxy ladies
Girl girl girl
Get on your back
Ladies, ladies, ladies
Ladies get funky
Girls girls
Any funky now
Any funky you now
Hey ladies, break dance
Girl.. I been watchin' you
Girls girls girls girls
She thinks shes the passionate one
Hey ladies, get funky
Huh, good god
Good god, damn
Huh good god
Baby baby baby
Is it funky brother
Hey hey hey hey ladies
Hey ladies...