1. WONDER GIRL

She was a wonder girl (some girl, that girl)
She was a wonder girl (some girl, that girl)

It was a grand old time we had
She was there and I was pretty glad about that too
Knowing that she knew a thing or two

She was a wonder girl (some girl, that girl)

She was a wonder to her friends
It's a wonder that she always started trends
And after all, trends make us contenders in the fall

Wonder girl, do me right at this ungodly hour

She was a wonder to her dad
A self-made man who owned all that he had
And after all, self-made men have daughters
Who just won't ball

Wonder girl, make me a wonder boy

She was a wonder girl (some girl, that girl)


2. FA LA FA LEE

Fa la fa lee, she ain't heavy she's a brother to me
What I need, she can't be
Nature, nurture, who's to say?
But still fa la, fa lee
Anything between us is a felony

Fa la fa lee, she thinks only of the higher parts of me
Such a shame, were I she
I'd set my sights much lower then I'd sing
Fa la fa la fa lee
But as it stands now that would be a felony

I sing fa la fa lee, but as it stands now
That would be a felony


3. ROGER

I'm picking up where I once left off in the
Search for a justified balance between the
Wealth that I have now and the wealth
That they all want to have

Let's ask Roger if he knows what I mean

Roger, Roger, let's take your Sue
How does she do it Roger, how does she do it, Roger?

Roger, Roger, has Sue got the balance right
For you, Roger, I ask you Roger, has she
Got the balance right for you?

Has she got it, has she got it?
Roger, Roger, Roger, Roger


4. HIGH C

A picket fence, I leaped it
Through your screen door, I gotta meet you

High C up and High C down
Since you left the opera you just frown a lot
And mumble, "I'm humble."

Press clippings hang from torn wallpaper
A dust covered phone, no one would ring her

High C up and High C down
Since you left the opera you just frown a lot
And you tell me

Tell me of the times when you were so big
In Vienna
And the people paid good money just to hear
You in your splendour

But that's all over now
That's all over now

Limited tastes, I wish I could help you
A rock-headed lad, I have got to help you

High C up and High C down
Since you left the opera you just frown a lot
And mumble, "I'm humble."

Come on home with me and will sing our little hearts out
We will hit High C or maybe somewhere thereabouts

Somewhere thereabouts


5. FLETCHER HONORAMA

Fletcher Honorama won't you rally 'round
The man who's on a limb?
Sing the songs that please him very softly
While we jolt him with a hymn
Please, go easy now with him
Because this is his final whim
So be sure that the boy don't die before the morn

Fletcher Honorama shall we justify the eighty Junes you've seen?
Since that might be stretching things
We'll merely sing the songs that made you scream

Please, go easy now with him
Because this is his final whim
So be sure that the boy don't die before the morn

Intakes and mistakes and lunch pails
And headaches were willed to your one living twin
I think that maybe you should have kept half
Of them, after all you worked for them
After all you worked for them

Telecast in fifty states and brought to you
By Anti-Wrinkle Dew
That's Fletcher Honorama see the world
Now from a different point of view

You, go easy now with him
Because this is his final whim
So be sure that the boy don't die before the morn
So be sure that the boy don't die before the morn


6. SIMPLE BALLET

In the city, in the country, in the towns throughout the world
All will join in, in the big scene,
So won't you please take off your shoes?

It's a ballet, simple ballet, so let's dance on
Pick a partner, take a tall one, take a small
One, take a fat one and let's dance on

Crews will film it, add the music
While the world has its feet engaged
Some critics love it, yet some pan it,
Some say "it's likely to cause a rage"

There'll be long shots, there'll be close shots, there'll Be mid-shots
Simple ballet was an idea, then a novel,
Next a movie, soon on T.V.

It's promotion of a new way of thinking
Instead of "Hey, orange drink," vendors
Will say, "get your souvenir posters of the ballet."

Do a plie' for the D.A. when he comes round
Your alleged conduct with the director has
Raised some questions that he wants
Answered (Good for the ratings)

It's a ballet, we thought a ballet and we danced on
We had no idea you'd hang out your coat on an
Issue thin as tissue so we danced our ballet

And we danced our ballet
And we danced our ballet


7. SLOWBOAT

Slowboat takes me to your home everyday
And I wait for you knowing that you won't
Come home, just today
For you've found someone new and you'll bid me adieu
And I leave you now, but I'll come back another day

Oooh, sail me far away
Slowboat, bring me back another day
Oooh, sail me far away

Slowboat sail off toward the seventh sea
Far away from you, but somehow coming
Close again and again
And again as we near from some sign it appears
That you won't come home, you won't come home just today

Oooh, sail me far away
Slowboat, bring me back another day

Slowboat takes me where I'll always be
Far away from you, but knowing that you
Won't come near me but you hear me
And you'll always be a true love to me
Though you're never home, I'll come back another day

Oooh, sail me far away
Slowboat, bring me back another day


8. BIOLOGY 2

"Hey Lisa, they're having a big party down at the Allele Pool tonight!"

"Oooh, let's do it!"

You will put your good traits in
You will put your bad traits out

Do the Homozygous as you shake them all about

Unless you've got your dominance down in
Your genes you'll have a kid, invalid
Just like Mendel's beans
Oh hold me, you know you are my one and only phenotype
And together we could have a genotype

Darwin willed that we would do or die
Brains and brawn are both in great supply

Kalikaks a-swimmin' back and forth will multiply
You could choose your ancestors and grow just like a weed
Pick a stud to congeal your blood, and get your earlobes freed


9. SACCHARIN AND THE WAR

Fifteen years the bus had waited
Before it moved on into the town
Eye liner worn by all their girls

Through the night the war was fought
Each "eye liner" took two small drops
Reaction - Elation - Joy, Joy, Joy

Every girl took in a doctor
The Constitution says: "you must house the men"
Each doctor undermined a plot

All the weight that was soon lost
They erected as a golden cross

Remember the weight is no longer here

Through the street girls sang
The marching bands brought on the rain
The Doctors stood by the gold cross

One "eye liner" she had an idea
She read the Book, the Golden Book
It seems another Man had come across a cross

Dr. Jones they crucified

But, all their weight was returned back

Ha, Ha for all the girls now


10. BIG BANDS

I smile like Herbert Hoover when they play
I dream of banker's daughters, better days
Care to dance my lady
Live near here?
They certainly sound in fine form, do you care?

I am quite partial
Broke, spent, I still marshall (all my strenght when big bands play)

Follow me my lady to my home
See my large collection, some on loan

Of every big band record ever made
I had to sell my heater, so don't shake

I am quite partial
Broke, spent, I still marshal all my strength when big bands blare

I smile like Herbert Hoover when the big bands play
I dream of banker's daughters, better days

For I am quite partial
Broke, spent, I marshal all my strength when big bands play

Knowing of their flare for filling empty
Stomachs, empty hearts, they're not so
Far apart, they're not so far apart
And if you can't sleep late one night,
It's not your coffee, it's the bunk

I am quite partial
Broke, spent, I still marshall all my strength

I smile like Herbert Hoover when the big bands play
I frequent the dance halls most every night into the day
I know the name of every trombone player that exists
They don't know I used to blow before the Crash had hit our land

Before the Crash

I find it so much warmer in the ballroom than at home
A common bond unites us so we're really not alone
Sure we've got some problems, but tonight we won't admit it
Take my hand my lady friend, we'll make it seem like we were there tonight


11. (NO MORE) MR. NICE GUYS

Just when sin is quite the thing, there's one
Who holds quite tight to what had worked before
What's his outlet, what's his secret,
Is it something one can buy at some drug store?
Could the gospel be his girl,
Does he exercise by breaking 2 by 4's?

Just what is his game?
Could he be enticed?
No one's quite lame
No one's quite nice

No more Mr. Nice Guys
Few are left but him
No more Mr. Nice Guys
The Nice Guys cannot and the Nice Guys
Shall not, the Nice Guys will not win

She expressed a strong desire in relieving him of his anxiety
She succeeded very well for now she's mother to a nice family
If you had to call a winner you would call it her,
though she might disagree

He could be enticed
His game had to end
But he's still quite nice
She sees other men than him

No more Mr. Nice Guys
Nice guys won't suffice
No more Mr. Nice Guys
The Nice Guys cannot and the Nice Guys
Shall not, the Nice Guys won't suffice