1. A RUSH AND A PUSH AND THE LAND IS OURS

I am the ghost of Troubled Joe
Hung by his pretty white neck
Some eighteen months ago
I travelled to a mystical time zone
But I missed my bed
So I soon came home
They said:
There's too much caffeine
In your blood stream
And a lack of real spice
In your life
I said:
Leave me alone because I'm alright, dad
Just surprised to still be on my own
Oh, but don't mention love
I'd hate the strain of the pain again
A rush and a push and the land that
We stand on is ours
It has been before
So it shall be again
And people who are uglier than you and I
They take what they need, and leave
Ooh, but don't mention love
I'd hate the pain of the strain all over again
A rush and a push and the land that
We stand on is ours
It has been before
So why can't it be now
And people who are weaker than you and I
They take what they want from life
Oh, but don't mention love
No, just don't mention love
A rush and a push and the land that we stand on is ours
Your youth may be gone
But you're still a young man
So phone me, phone me, phone me
So phone me, phone me, phone me
Oh, I think I'm in love
Oh, I think I'm in love
Oh, I think I'm in love
I think I'm in love



2. I STARTED SOMETHING I COULDN’T FINISH

The lanes were silent
With nothing or no one around for miles
I doused our friendly venture
With a hard-faced
Three-word gesture
I started something
I forced you into a zone
And you were clearly
Never meant to go
Hair brushed and parted
Typical me, typical me
Typical me
I started something and now I'm not too sure
I grabbed you by the guilded beams
That's what Tradition means
And I doused another venture
With a gesture
That was absolutely vile
I started something
Forced you to a zone
And you were clearly
Never meant to go
Hair brushed and parted
Typical me, typical me
Typical me
I started something and now I'm not too sure
I garbbed you by the guilded beams
That's what Tradition means
And now eighteen months hard-labour
Seems fair enough
I started something
Forced you to a zone
And you were clearly
Never meant to go
Hair brushed and parted
Typical me, typical me
Typical me
I started something
And now I'm not too sure



3. DEATH OF A DISCO DANCER

The death of a disco dancer
Well, it happens a lot 'round here
And if you think Peace
Is a common goal
Well, that goes to show
Just how little you know
The death of a disco dancer
Well, I'd rather not get involved
I never talk to my neighbour
I'd just rather not get involved
Love, peace and harmony
Love, peace and harmony
Oh, very nice
Very nice
Very nice
Very nice
But maybe in the next world



4. GIRLFRIEND IN A COMA

Girlfriend in a coma, I know
I know it's serious
Girlfriend in a coma, I know
I know, it's really serious
There were times
When I could
Have 'murdered' her
But, you know, I would hate
Anything to happen to her
No, I don’t want to see her
Do you really think
She'll pull through
Girlfriend in a coma, I know
I know it's serious
There were times when I could
Have 'strangled' her
But, you know, I would hate
Anything to happen to her
Would you please let me see her
Do you really think
She'll pull through
Let me whisper my last goodbyes
I know it’s serious



5. STOP ME IF YOU THINK YOU ‘VE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

Stop me, stop me
Stop me if you think that you've
Heard this one before
Stop me, stop me
Stop me if you think that you've
Heard this one before
Nothing's changed
I still love you, oh I still love you
Only slightly less than I used to
I was delayed, I was way laid
An emergency stop
I smelt the last ten seconds of life
I carshed down on the crossbar
And the pain was enough to make
A shy, bald buddhist reflect
And plan a mass-murder
Who said I'd lied because I never
Who said I'd lied because I never
I was detained, I was restrained
He broke my knees and then he really laid into me
Friday night in Out-patients
Who said I'd lied, because I never
Who said I'd lied, because I never
Oh, so I drank one
Or was it four
And when I fell on the floor
I drank more
Stop me, stop me
Stop me if you think that you've
Heard this one before
Nothing's changed
I still love you
I still love you
But only slightly
Less than I used to



6. LAST NIGHT I DREAMT THAT SOMEONE LOVED ME

Last night I dreamt
That somebody loved me
No hope, but no harm
Just another false alarm
Last night I felt
Real arms around me
No hope, no harm
Just another false alarm
So, tell me how long
Before the last one
And tell me how long
Before the right one
This story is old, I KNOW
But it goes on
This story is old, I KNOW
But it goes on



7. UNHAPPY BIRTHDAY

I've come to wish you an unhappy birthday
I've come to wish you an unhappy birthday
Because you're evil
And you lie
And if you should die
I may feel slightly sad
But I won't cry
Loved and lost
And some may say
When usuallly its Nothing
Surely you're happy
It should be this way
I say: "No, I'm gonna kill my dog"
And: "May the lines sag heavy
And deep tonight "
I've come to wish you an unhappy birthday
I've come to wish you an unhappy birthday
Because you're evil
And you lie
And if you should die
I may feel slightly sad
But I won't cry
Loved and lost
Some people say
When usually its Nothing
Surly you're happy
It should be this way
I said "No"
And then I shot myself
So, drink, drink, drink
And be ill tonight
From the one you left behind
From the one you left behind



8. PAINT A VULGAR PICTURE

At the record company meeting
On their hands - a dead star
And ooh, the plans that they weave
And ooh, the sickening greed
At the record company party
On their hands - a dead star
The sycophantic slags all say:
I knew him first, and I knew him well
Re-issue, Re-package, Re-package
Re-evaluate the songs
Double pack with a photograph
Extra Track and a tacky badge
A-list, playlist
Please them, please them
Please them, please them
Sadly, THIS was your life
But you could have said no
If you'd wanted to
BPI, MTV, BBC
Please them, Please them
Sadly, this was your life
But you could have said no
If you'd wanted to
You could have walked away
Couldn't you?
I touched you at the soundcheck
You had no real way of knowing
In my heart I begged: "please, take me with you
I don't care where you're going"
But to you I was faceless
I was fawning, I was boring
Just a child from those ugly new houses
Who could never begin to know
Who could never really know
Best of, most of
Satiate the need
Slip them into different sleeves
Buy both, and be deceived
Climber, new entry, re-entry
World tour
Please the Press in Belgium
THIS was your life
And when it fails to recoup
Well, maybe:
You just haven't earned it yet, baby
I walked a pace behind you at the soundcheck
You're just the same as I am
What makes most people feel happy
Leads us headlong into harm
So, in my legs down to the knees
But me and my true love
We will never meet again
At the record company meeting
On thier hands at last! A dead star
But they cannot taint you in my eyes
No, they cannot touch you now
No, they cannot hurt you my darling
They cannot touch you now
But me and my true love
Will never meet again



9. DEATH AT ONE’S ELBOW

Oh Glenn
Don't come to the house tonight
Oh, Glenn
Don't come to the house tonight
Because there's somebody here
Who really really loves you
Stay home
Be bored
Oh, Glenn
Don't come to the house tonight
Oh, Glenn
Don't come to the house tonight
Because there's somebody here
Who'll take a hatchet to your ear
How the frustration renders me
Hateful, Glenn!
Don't come to the house tonight
Don't come to the house tonight
Because you'll slip on the
Trail of my bespattered remains
And so, that's why
Goodbye my love, goodbye my love
Goodbye my love, goodbye my love
Goodbye my love, goodbye my love



10. I WON’T SHARE YOU

I won't share you
I won't share you
With the drive
The ambition
And the zeal I feel
This is my time
As the note I wrote
Was read, she said
Has the Perrier gone
Straight to my head
Or is life plainly sick and cruel, instead
No, no, no, no, no, no
I won't share you
I won't share you
With the drive
And the dreams inside
This is my time
Life tends to come and go
Well, that's OK
Just as long as you know
Life tends to come and go
Well, that's OK
Just as long as you know
I won't share you
I won't share you
With the drive
And the dreams inside
This is my time
This is my time